I WANT TO BE A BIG THIEF

I want to be a thief,
No! Not a thief, I want to be a big thief.
I want to be a big thief because
big thieves get a round of applause
while small thieves are hanged and roasted.
I want to be a big thief so that I can buy
justice when am caught.
I want to be a big thief so that the big laws
are against them when am above them.
I want to be a big thief so that I can control
the system, run the show, call the shots.
I want to be a big thief because I want
idiots to line the streets praising me
for stealing from them, I want pastors
to preach long sermons about God's
blessing with me as an example.
I want the TV stations, radio, newspapers,
blogs and social media to be a wash
with my story of rags to riches.
I want to give motivational talks on
hard work, smart work and god first crap.
I want to steal so much that I can't keep
count of it and be beyond the reach of
their touch.
I want to be a big thief who can pay
the hangman to hang himself when
he knocks at my door for a date with
the gallows.
I want to be a big thief because I need
to sit on the front seats in church,
I want to sit on the bishop's seat if I can
or at worse next to him in the throne
of glory.
I want the top layer, I want the thick soup
that only the most anointed partake.
I want to be the poster boy of success,
the reference point of success stories,
the epitome of miraculous hard work,
I want to get there and see you clap for
me because I made it.
I want you to clap for me for turning
charcoal into gold, eggs and chicks into
billions, water into wine and whatever.
I want to be such a big thief that when I
get arrested, I get VIP presidential escort
to the station in full glare of media cameras,
I want idiots I steal from to rush to my
defense and shout the famous "mtu wetu."
I want to be so rich that all systems get
chills when they even think of asking me
about the source of my wealth or nature
of my business.
I want to be so reach that the taxman pees
in his pants when my name is just mentioned.
I want to be a big thief because the
end justifies the means.
Hard work is overrated, intergrity is a
selective fallacy and honesty is a bag
of bullshit.
If you doubt me, go to the prison and
ask that poor honest convict serving
a lifetime in jail for a crime he was framed.
I want to steal from you until you
celebrate me and if you agree or object,
still shout your loudest amen.
Have faith with me and the Lord shall
bless you with handouts when I get
there.
I want to be a big thief so that when I
finally kick the overflowing bucket
I couldn't even finish eating from you
write in bold on my epitaph,
Here lies a great man, a hero, a legend,
He came, he saw and he conquered,
May he rest with the angels, here lies
a big thief who dared to dream and become.
I want children from all tribes and nations,
streets in my village and the cities to be
named after me,
I want my name on dillapidated public
schools and pathetic public hospitals
and I health centers.
I want a statue erected in my memory in
the heroes corner for future generations
after I am dead and gone.
I want the genius of my thievery to be
immortalized in song and dance,
books and scriptures.
I hope you understand why I want
to be a big thief.
I want to be a big thief.
May the day break.

#TheMusingsOfaMadMan
#TheReflectionsOfThePoet
#TheLoudThoughtsOfaSilentPen
#Camistare2019
© Camistare 2019